眼看四方●耳听八面

自己的担子自己挑（箴言 22:6）

我在书局里的架子前挑选文具，突然从身后传来碰撞声，随即身后的架子就有物件掉到地上了。我转头一看，一个六、七岁的小男孩正好跑过。他边跑边看了看地上的物件，再瞄了我一眼就继续跑开了。正当我准备把他“请”回来，他的妈妈在架子的尾端出现了。她看看地上的物件和站在一旁的我，就转头温和地对小男孩说：“回来！你是不是把东西撞倒了？”。小男孩走到妈妈面前，轻轻的点了点头。妈妈接着很温柔却很坚定的对孩子说：“既然是你撞倒的，怎么不先把东西捡起来？”。这时候，小男孩挨近妈妈身边，捉住妈妈的手，轻声地说：“你去捡。”我一听，有点失望，于是趋前准备拾起地上的物件。怎料，与此同时我听见妈妈对他说：“是你自己撞倒的东西，为什么是我去捡呢？应该是你自己捡啊！”

可是太迟了，我已经“顺手”把物件捡起来放回原位了。其实，我有点后悔。年轻的妈妈看见我已经把物件放回原位了，就转头对孩子说：“看吧，阿姨帮你把东西放回去了，你该怎么作呢？”小男孩转过头来，虽然害羞却很真诚的对我说了很的一句“谢谢”。我微笑着对他点点头，也转过头去给妈妈一个微笑。

我的微笑是赞赏小男孩的诚实和礼貌；但更重要的是要给这位年轻的妈妈一个肯定！这是一位有智慧的妈妈。这位妈妈首先没有袒护自己的孩子，却也没有“冤枉”孩子，而是先问清楚状况。之后她提醒孩子要去承担他的小错误（撞倒物件）所带来的后果（将物件放回原位），她很坚定孩子要学习“自己的担子自己挑”，而不是为了省下麻烦或怕孩子尴尬难堪就直接帮他“收拾残局”。这位妈妈在这件小事上，耐心等待孩子去面对他该面对的结果，并教导他负起他该负起的责任。虽然后来有一个“耐不住”的阿姨先把物件放回原位了，妈妈也要他学习向这位阿姨说“谢谢”。这是担当！这是教养！

虽然我确实“后悔”自己动作太快，“剥夺”了小男孩学习承担后果的机会，但是当我看到这位妈妈，我有信心这个小男孩能在妈妈的影响和调教下成为一位有修养、有正义、有担当的人。

以马内利！

主的使女，
秀娟

Carrying One’s Own Burden (Proverbs 22:6)

I was at a bookshop, selecting stationery from a shelf when suddenly a bang was heard from behind, followed by an object falling from a shelf behind me. I turned around and spotted a 6–7-year-old boy running past. He saw what was on the floor while running and took a quick look at me before continuing his evasion. I was about to “invite” him back when his mother emerged from that end of the shelf. She assessed what was on the floor and then turned and spoke to the child gently, “Come back! Did you knock that down?” The boy came before his mother and nodded. “Since you knocked it down, why don’t you pick it up?” The boy leaned closer to his mother, held her hand, and said softly, “You pick.” I was a little disappointed when I heard that and went ahead to pick up the object. At the same time, I heard the mother saying, “It is you who knocked something down; why should it be me to pick it up? You should do it yourself!”

But it was too late; I had “conveniently” picked it up and restored it to where it was. In fact, I regretted it a little. The young mother, seeing the item back in its place, turned to her child and said, “See, aunty has put it back for you, what should you do?” The boy turned around, sincerely though still shy, and said a clearly audible “Thank you.” I smiled and nodded to him; I turned towards his mother and smiled too.

Smiling at the boy was my way of appreciating his honesty and courtesy; more importantly, it is my appreciation toward this young mother! For here we have a wise mother. Firstly, she was neither defensive nor accusing but rather established the facts. Next, she reminded the child to be responsible for little mistakes (knocking down objects) and the consequences (restoring items back where they belong); she was determined that the child learns “carrying one’s own burdens” and avoided picking up the child’s mess just for the sake of saving the trouble or the child’s embarrassment. In small matters like these, this mother exercised patience in waiting for the child to face his consequences and taught him how to shoulder his rightful responsibilities. Though this aunty hasn’t “held back” and had already put the stuff back, his mother still required him to learn to say “thank you” to this aunty. This is responsibility! This is upbringing!

Though I really “regretted” being too quick, hence “depriving” the boy of an opportunity to face the consequence, when I look at this mother, I am confident this boy will, through his mother’s upbringing and influence, be an educated, righteous, and responsible person.

Emmanuel

His Servant Maid,
Lena
(Translated by Gan Pak Lim)